Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
