We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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