Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
please come you make the beer taste better
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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