I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
