Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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