I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
