**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
we made out on top of his cat.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
