She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize