So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
