he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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