Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize