I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
