i think my tv is drunk
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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