I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
