3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
