Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
