She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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