I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize