we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
