Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
