so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
