I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
