I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize