I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
