I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
try to milk me bitch
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