i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
