Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
