"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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