hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
