Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
They are going to name an STD after you.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Randomize
