just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
