Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
