idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
