I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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