Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
