No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
