So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
