My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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