So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
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