i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
