PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
A bitchslap is in order.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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