We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
