New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize
