I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize