I'm lost and stupid without you.
i think my mom watched the whole time
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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