dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Randomize
