Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
party gras won. party gras always wins.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
