Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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