dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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