I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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