Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
